I was invisible for a few weeks moving to a new city, you can read about some of my learnings here. I’d stayed off social media, and found myself totally focused on the job at hand. I lost the habit on checking in on various social sites, and felt the better for it. I’m trying to continue this new habit setting up times and timers for social media sites. Cutting off social sites at least an hour before sleeping has improved my sleep and not turning them on until I’ve sat down to my computer keeps my morning calmer.
It’s interesting how a new city, a new place can also support the growth of a new mindset, new ideas. I have, with the help of my own coach been able to bring a free short new training to my community. This training looks at how we can transition from confusion to fulfillment, from overwhelm to joy, it’s about mindset and much comes from my own experience.
I know people who feel overwhelmed, anxious about job loss, asking how can they continue with little or no money coming in. Others talk about being unable to concentrate, their mind at sixes and sevens. They find it difficult to read a book, reading short articles is easier. Some look at their goals and wonder how on earth can they be achievable, still others are feeling fear and uncertainty, fear holds them back even when those goals are still possible. Facing that fear, focusing on the immediate rather than long term future can bring back hope into our lives. I found this article was really helpful in providing advice in how to deal with uncertainty. Too often a spark of negative thought spirals into a rabbit hole that we can’t seem to get out of, however the same pattern can help us make our own positive energetic force. For every negative thought, turn it into a question.
As we move into Autumn, and Winter, many of us are wondering what next? What next challenge will this new year, new decade bring? How will we manage with COVID, work, family, limitations on socializing and travel? I’ve been talking with clients about their increasing anxiety, not only on what next with COVID, but anxiety around every decision, every challenge. Stuff that normally wouldn’t cause stress is doing so!
So what to do? When I’m feeling particularly anxious, or find myself tied up in knots about a decision or action I need to take, I stop and try to face that ‘objectionable room-mate in my head’ by acknowledging the problem. Stop myself going further down that rabbit hole, which can often turn into a list of negative shortcomings! Or in some cases reminiscences of what has gone wrong in the past, feelings of being wronged: you know where I’m going…
As soon as I notice that anxiety or feeling of panic, I acknowledge it, and start to take it apart. Did something happen to trigger this feeling or is it just the underlining stress of today? Then I use a pen and paper, I write – what is it that’s causing my anxiety? I let it out, always interesting what comes from my pen. I try and move the pressure from thinking I ‘should’ do this or that, to what do I ‘want’ to do. Sometimes the answer is nothing, and that’s okay, others there’s an action I want to take, and so I work out the steps and move forward.
One of the things I’m trying not to dwell on right now is what does the future look like. I continue to work on being okay with uncertainty. And why not, the only thing we really know about the future is that we are going on a new path, there will be good and bad things along the way. If I allow myself to focus my attention on the worry of what if… then how is it going to help me today? Rather I’m looking at today, next week, next month and not much more.. now, for a dreamer, a planner this is a challenge. However, staying in the present is so important for us all right now, for our mental health, to cocoon down with our loved ones (even virtually) and work through these unknown times.
What are the questions being asked?
Life is funny, every now and then it seems to believe we need a real jolt, or wake up and that’s what I’m feeling right now. It is a time of examination and discovery. We’re being asked to really examine our lives and question every aspect of who we are and how we are living? We can’t worry about what tomorrow will bring, but we can reflect on what we do want, and what we don’t want to bring back from life before the pandemic. We can make choices to change our present, which in turn can change our future. We all have choices, it may not be easy, it takes work, courage and often involves others, those we love, to support us. What choices are you going to make as we continue to move into uncertainty?
Remember you only have one life to live. Live it to the fullest, it’s never too late to make changes and if you need a little support. Contact me… let’s talk